I close my eyes & sing a song.
Try to imagine you're here,
shed me away from tears.
♥ S e r e n d i p i t y ♥
Saturday, 19 October 2013
Thursday, 17 October 2013
Collapsed
No one will truly understand this kind of disappointment, and the sorrow it brings.
Neither you, he or she.
Only me, myself.
I'm totally collapse today.
Can't stop myself from sobbing.
Seeking for the truth can be so much hurting.
Process of pursue the thing you want can be such tiring.
Feel myself as fragile as crystal ball at this moment.
Might broken anytime of gently touch.
Still praying for the last chance.
Prove me that good things will really come to those who wait.
Please.
Please.
Wednesday, 16 October 2013
New chapter of life
I'm gonna step into a new chapter of my life real soon. Somehow I still feel lost at this moment, I doubted did I made the right decision?
Just read through an essay this morning, it's about 'The 10 Reasons Why No One Knows What They're Doing in Their 20's'. The feeling is so 'meh' while I'm reading.
fyi: I define the word 'meh' as undescribable feeling, sort of helpless feeling.
I'm not really scared to adapt into a new learning environment, I'm not scared to make a bunch of new friends, in fact, I'm ready myself to meet a bunch of awesome new friends. But I really afraid of moving out from my house, my home. Though it's not now, but soon or later, I'll need to survive in a new place without seeing those familiar faces everyday, nagging by them often, sleeping in my princess room every night. So insecure feeling, and I don't really like this feeling. I'm a very homesick person, like seriously. Still remember that once I went for outstation due to working, for 7 days I cannot back home. The moment I received the call from my mum my tears are dropping out from my eyes & my mum was so worried about me, kept asking me whether what had happened. Haha, so funny as now I reflecting back the conversation & the scene. My colleagues were all there, quite malu hahaha.
I was told that everyone needs to step out from our comfort zone in order to grow, just another lesson to learn in our life. Guess one day I'll understand this principle. And as for why I mentioned that I'm afraid of making a wrong decision. That's because the course I applied is not the first place in my mind, although I'm quite interested with it.
Too many to consider, sigh...... I need some guidance. Am feeling so 'MEH' right now.
Just read through an essay this morning, it's about 'The 10 Reasons Why No One Knows What They're Doing in Their 20's'. The feeling is so 'meh' while I'm reading.
fyi: I define the word 'meh' as undescribable feeling, sort of helpless feeling.
I'm not really scared to adapt into a new learning environment, I'm not scared to make a bunch of new friends, in fact, I'm ready myself to meet a bunch of awesome new friends. But I really afraid of moving out from my house, my home. Though it's not now, but soon or later, I'll need to survive in a new place without seeing those familiar faces everyday, nagging by them often, sleeping in my princess room every night. So insecure feeling, and I don't really like this feeling. I'm a very homesick person, like seriously. Still remember that once I went for outstation due to working, for 7 days I cannot back home. The moment I received the call from my mum my tears are dropping out from my eyes & my mum was so worried about me, kept asking me whether what had happened. Haha, so funny as now I reflecting back the conversation & the scene. My colleagues were all there, quite malu hahaha.
I was told that everyone needs to step out from our comfort zone in order to grow, just another lesson to learn in our life. Guess one day I'll understand this principle. And as for why I mentioned that I'm afraid of making a wrong decision. That's because the course I applied is not the first place in my mind, although I'm quite interested with it.
Too many to consider, sigh...... I need some guidance. Am feeling so 'MEH' right now.
Monday, 14 October 2013
Just some personal feelings
Concealing feeling is just not my type of thing. I frequently share my stories to other, no matter it's happiness or sadness one. And this is because I believe people will share their joy too.
But in life, everyone seems like used to hide their real personality in order to avoid getting hurt by others. Telling the truth seems like just what a fool will exactly did.
I often wonder, is that I 入世未深? Those who I thought I could believe, they broke the credit. At the end, there was a thick wall built up between us. Throwing tantrum is definitely not a smart choice, silence is golden at the moment.
In real life, those who are good looking always enjoy the special treatment while some others are really putting effort on work. In fact, I think this is uncompromising. People tend to look things from surface no matter how good or how bad the personality you were hiding inside. And how you define the word 'pretty' or 'handsome'? Everyone is special. No?
As I veining all about this, I do actually know & understand that there are uncountable different personality in human, just it's yet to discover. Well, I still believing, no one is perfect, but everyone is unique. The difference between our thinking & values might probably brought us closer, just as if you learn to tolerate & communicate in a correct way.
All these are just some of my personal thought that came into my mind last night before I fall asleep.
Giver & taker, which character do you prefer? :)
But in life, everyone seems like used to hide their real personality in order to avoid getting hurt by others. Telling the truth seems like just what a fool will exactly did.
I often wonder, is that I 入世未深? Those who I thought I could believe, they broke the credit. At the end, there was a thick wall built up between us. Throwing tantrum is definitely not a smart choice, silence is golden at the moment.
In real life, those who are good looking always enjoy the special treatment while some others are really putting effort on work. In fact, I think this is uncompromising. People tend to look things from surface no matter how good or how bad the personality you were hiding inside. And how you define the word 'pretty' or 'handsome'? Everyone is special. No?
As I veining all about this, I do actually know & understand that there are uncountable different personality in human, just it's yet to discover. Well, I still believing, no one is perfect, but everyone is unique. The difference between our thinking & values might probably brought us closer, just as if you learn to tolerate & communicate in a correct way.
All these are just some of my personal thought that came into my mind last night before I fall asleep.
Giver & taker, which character do you prefer? :)
Sunday, 13 October 2013
Sunday
It's Sunday, again.
People used to say Sunday is the beginning of the week, but as for me, I think that Sunday is the end of the whole week.
Know what? I still remember that we used to stick together lazily on a Sunday afternoon.
Just both of us, stay together.
But those days are gone.
Was falling so hard this time.
But those days are gone.
Was falling so hard this time.
Friday, 11 October 2013
11 Oct, 2013
Dear my love,
If you ever wonder how I have been lately? Ya, I'm doing fine, pretty good with my life. Just the moment while I'm doing current activity, often, I wish you were here with me, guess everything will be more meaningful with you by my side. I guess you got your pretty own life. So do I, but it definitely will be better if you were a part of my life.
You just wouldn't know how much I miss you. So much that my eyes are welling up with tears as I type this. Every night before I close my eyes, I look back at our photo, reflecting back of the silly conversation between us. But each time when I thought of it that is the heartbreak moment and I always failed to control my emotional. There are too many to say, a lot more than goodbye.
How's life? I hope you're doing good. It's not a single day goes by without me thinking of you. Facebook & Instagram is the only platform where I can get to know your recent life/activities yet they aren't all.
If you ever wonder how I have been lately? Ya, I'm doing fine, pretty good with my life. Just the moment while I'm doing current activity, often, I wish you were here with me, guess everything will be more meaningful with you by my side. I guess you got your pretty own life. So do I, but it definitely will be better if you were a part of my life.
You just wouldn't know how much I miss you. So much that my eyes are welling up with tears as I type this. Every night before I close my eyes, I look back at our photo, reflecting back of the silly conversation between us. But each time when I thought of it that is the heartbreak moment and I always failed to control my emotional. There are too many to say, a lot more than goodbye.
Not really sure whether should I be happy or sad seeing you total adapt into a new life without me.Yet I'm still here missing you, missing the days we been together. However, sometimes life just happened, whether we want it or not. Everything changes, nothing stays permanent, even is us.
Life goes on anyway. In case there's one day you found this & reading it, just to let you know, I will always love you & care of you as always.
Last but not least, for the time we spent together, I consider myself as very lucky.
Last but not least, for the time we spent together, I consider myself as very lucky.
With loves,
Qiau Wei
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